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Kiriko Shijima vs. Mockingbird (AoS)
Kiriko Shijima vs. Mockingbird is a What-If? Death Battle by I'm Lynda. It features Kiriko Shijima from Kamen Rider Drive and Mockingbird from Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Description Two female martial arts powerhouses – one a police officer who is more than she seems, and the other a secret agent who is always must more than she seems. Interlude Wiz: Women, supposedly the weaker sex. But, they are usually a great deal more than they seem. Boomstick: That’s right, if you take these two women lightly, you are likely to live to regret it...or perhaps you won’t! Wiz: The one is Kiriko Shijima, police officer, and member of the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department's Special Circumstances and Incidents Investigation Division. Boomstick: And the other is Bobbi Morse, Avenger and Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. Wiz: I’m Wiz, and he’s Boomstick. Boomstick: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Kiriko Shijima Wiz: On April 14, 2014, a group of artificial life forms called Roidmudes executed their plan to overthrow humanity. Boomstick: Snorting Wait! Roidmudes? Seriously? Hemorroidmudes? some more Wiz: Well, you might find their name funny, but they themselves are anything but. Boomstick: laughing Anything butt! ''' Wiz: The Roidmudes are fearsome antagonists – armored and difficult to kill, they are experts at the martial arts, and often have special abilities that make each one a dangerous foe. '''Boomstick: Yeah, they can be a real pain in the ass! < Ha! Ha! Ha!> Wiz: But...by Boomstick laughing...their creator had prepared for someone to fight protect the humans against them, Kamen Rider Protodrive, a very special Roidmude. Boomstick: Sort of a semi-roid. ''' Wiz: Boomstick, will you knock it off? Yes, and before he was captured by the Roidmudes, Protodrive rescued a very special police officer, Kiriko Shijima. '''Boomstick: OK. Seriously, the Roids’ creator laid out plans to fight them, which included creating a special department in the Tokyo police department called the Special Circumstances and Incidents Investigation Division, and began fishing for someone who could become a new and better Kamen Rider. Wiz: Sadly, Kiriko could not be that Kamen Rider, but when that candidate was found, she did everything in her power to see to it that he became the best Kamen Rider possible. Boomstick: And whenever Kamen Rider Drive - phew, that’s a lot of syllables! – went out to kick some Roids, Kiriko was by his side. Wiz: And, though she was no Kamen Rider, Kiriko was able to fight alongside him. She is a martial powerhouse, who is dangerous with her hands and feet. Boomstick: And, speaking of her feet, her martial arts abilities are augmented by her Red Cowl Boots – special boots that turn her feet into lethal weapons. During testing, one straight-on kick dented an armor plate to the depth of about two inches, while a follow-up roundhouse kick completely shattered the target – armor and all! That gave her the ability to give Roids kicks that they would not soon forget. Wiz: And, as the Roidmudes were effectively bulletproof, Kiriko was given special bullets for her police sidearm that could blow fist-sized holes in their armor. Boomstick: And the last probably is the least, like the Kamen Rider guys, Kiriko carries up to three Hot Wheels cars. Wiz: Boomstick! Boomstick: OK. OK. They aren’t toys. Instead they are autonomous, artificially intelligent cars that assist people in fighting the Roid monsters. But, they do look like Hot Wheels cars. Wiz: Nonetheless, in spite of the cars, Kiriko Shijima is not a combatant to be taken lightly. She is fighting a war against artificial life forms that want to kill all humans, and she has gone toe-to-toe with three Roidmudes and she is still standing! Mockingbird Boomstick: Bobbi Morse is an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., the organization that handles the crises too small to call in those god-like superheroes, the Avengers. Wiz: Bobbi’s code name is “Mockingbird.” She’s named for a bird that can mimic the calls of other birds, confusing others into thinking that it’s something it’s not. And, that is Bobbi’s specialty. Though she has no superpowers, she is great at going undercover and making people think that she is something that she isn’t. Boomstick: But, when the time comes for action, Mockingbird really kicks some ass. She’s a martial artist of no small ability, often taking on multiple opponents at a time. Wiz: And besides being an expert martial artist, Mockingbird is armed with a pair of batons that serve as her primary armaments. She can use them as blunt instruments to bludgeon her opponents into submission, or she can have them generate a burst of electricity. Boomstick: She has taken on Hydra agents, S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent Melinda May, and she even took on Grant Ward and Agent 33 in a two-on-one match that she came within an inch of winning. Wiz: She keeps a cool head before and during a fight, and is one of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s heaviest hitters. Boomstick: And if she draws her batons when she’s looking at you, just go ahead an lie down, because you are about to get the pummeling of a lifetime! Intermission Wiz: Alright the combatants are set; let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: Its time for a DEATH BATTLE! DEATH BATTLE! Pre-Fight Bobbi Morse was not happy about being sent on this mission. Here she was in Japan, in the middle of the night, looking to break into a house, and her only backup was Lance Hunter, her rather unreliable ex-husband. To make matters worse, she could not even begin to blend in to the crowd. If *anyone* saw her, they would immediately realize that she didn’t belong here. This house was connected to some sort of robots that the Japanese government had been fighting. Coulson was certain that there was some sort of papers in this house that would benefit S.H.I.E.L.D., and so here she was. She crept along one side of the house, but the windows were too exposed here. She rounded the corner, and found a window with a bush beneath it. It wasn’t perfect, but Bobbi figured that it would do. She pulled a special Slim Jim out of her belt, and slid it into the gap of the window. She felt the locking mechanism, and began to work on jimmying it open. Suddenly, a voice started speaking behind her in high-speed Japanese. It came as no surprise when Hunter spoke through her earpiece. “Speak to me Bobbi. What’s happening?” “Shut up!” she quietly hissed back at him. She slowly turned around, and found herself facing a female police officer. The woman was wearing an outlandish helmet on her head, with cables and red...things on it. The only thing that Bobbi understood clearly was the revolver that the woman was holding in her hand, and pointing right at her! * * * Kiriko was standing in the house’s capacious garden, waving the wand from the Heavy Acceleration Particle Measuring Device, and finding nothing. The Roidmudes had definitely been active here, but the detector was finding nothing. Suddenly, she saw movement from the corner of her eye, and she turned just in time to see a tall figure disappearing around the corner. She considered calling Shinnosuke, who fights Roidmudes in the form of Kamen Rider Drive, but she wasn’t even certain that that was a Roidmude. Perhaps the man she saw was just a sneak thief. Well, she was a police officer, and she would handle the problem like a police officer. Her backup, Lieutenant Otta was barely five meters away from her, so she quietly called his name, indicated the house, and began running towards where she had seen the figure. Rounding the corner, she spotted a tall figure with long hair attempting to open one of the windows. She dropped the detector wand that she was holding, and drew her service revolver. Thankfully she had loaded it with the special bullets that Rinna Sawagami had developed to make the weapon effective against Roidmudes. '* she ordered the figure. Translated from Japanese. The intruder turned around, and Kiriko was surprised to see that it was gaijin woman, a Westerner. The woman looked at the gun, and raised her hands. Then, she looked at the bulky helmet of the Heavy Acceleration Particle Measuring Device and a look of surprise bloomed on her face. Genpachiro Otta rounded the corner, saw Kiriko with her gun drawn, and drew his revolver as well. A look of dumb surprise lit up his face when he saw who she was confronting. ' Kiriko demanded. * * * ‘Great,’ Bobbi thought to herself. ‘I just walked right into the Tokyo Police Department.’ The male officer appeared to be too surprised to do anything, but the female was holding her gun with firm stability. She figured that she could take two beat cops easily, but she had to first get that pistol pointed away from her. The female cop demanded information. S.O.P. Good. Nice predictable beat cops. Bobbi spoke Japanese fluently, but she wanted to convince the officers that she was nothing threatening. She put on her best smile, and lied to the woman, “I’m sorry, I am a visitor to your country, but don’t speak your language. Do you speak English?” The woman looked confused for a moment, and then answered, “Yes, I speak English. Who are you, and why are you breaking into this house?” “Watch yourself,” Hunter consoled from her earpiece. As if she needed any of his advice on this situation! “Um...” she began. “It’s really hard to explain. I was supposed to meet someone here, but nobody answered the door.” Inwardly Bobbi cringed at the lameness of what she had just said. * * * Kiriko looked at the woman in surprise. “No one answered the door, so you decided to break in?” she asked. The woman looked like she was searching her mind for a good answer, but Kiriko decided not to wait for one. The situation was very suspicious, and she was not going to deal with the woman here. “I’m afraid that we are going to have to take you in for questioning.” She turned to Leiutentant Otta and said, ' Genpachiro had been watching the women with his mouth open, as if he was too dazed to understand what was going on. At Kiriko’s words, he snapped his mouth closed, nodded briskly, and then reached into his belt pouch for his handcuffs. * * * Bobbi saw the male police officer draw a pair of black handcuffs and then step towards her. She put her wrists together, and pretended that she was going to allow the man to cuff her. She needed an opportunity to disarm the female cop, and she kept her eyes peeled. When the male cop raised the handcuffs above Bobbi’s wrists, the female holstered her gun and began to remove the helmet and crazy backpack that she was wearing. This was it! '''FIGHT! Bobbi quickly grabbed the man’s wrist, and spun the man in a flip that landed him on his back. She stepped forward, and gave the woman a kick in the chest, sending her flying. The man jumped to his feet and wrapped his arms around Bobbi’s chest and arms. She brought her elbow back into his diaphragm, grabbed one of his arms, dropped to one knee, and flipped him over her shoulder. When he was flat on her back, she punched him as hard as she could in the face, and the man went still. Hunter shouted into her ear, “I’m coming in!” Bobbi leaped to her feet, and charged the smaller Japanese woman, who had shed her equipment, and was reaching for her pistol again. “No!” Bobbi called back to Hunter. “This will be over in five seconds!” Bobbi got to Kiriko just as she brought the gun up. Bobbi seized her wrist, turned and dragged her into a flip. As she pulled the gun out of the other woman’s hand, it fired towards the house. Bobbi dropped her opponent on the ground, and suddenly noticed a slight rain of debris. She looked at the house, and was amazed to see that the bullet had punched a hole in the siding that was at least six inches in diameter. Just what was this woman firing, an RPG? Kiriko rolled back, and kicked the distracted woman in the face, propelling her backwards. She leaped to her feet, and dropped into a fighting stance. She knew that her opponent was no Roidmude, but she definitely was a good fighter. When Bobbi stepped forward, Kiriko kicked her in the stomach, and then kicked her in the face, sending her backwards. Kiriko stepped forward to keep the momentum. Bobbi threw a punch towards Kiriko’s face, which the woman blocked, and then she kicked her in the stomach, propelling her back a step. “OK, you don’t want to do this the easy way,” she said. Then, she reached behind herself and drew her batons. “Then I guess we’ll have to do it the hard way.” She swung one baton overhand, which Kiriko dodged, and then she swung the other overhand, which Kiriko also dodged. Bobbi swung around in a low kick, determined to take the woman’s legs out from under her, but she leaped over the kick, did a somersault and then leaped back to her feet. Bobbi pursued, and determined to use her longer reach to keep her opponent at a distance. She thrust her left baton towards Kiriko’s face, and as the woman dodged it, she thrust in with her right baton, striking her in the stomach. Kiriko spun back from the blow, trying to keep Bobbi from following up her success. Bobbi overtook the other woman, and grabbed her shoulders. She brought her knee up, kicking Kiriko in the stomach. Kiriko punched Bobbi in the stomach once, twice, and then a third time. Bobbi then brought her right baton down on Kiriko’s neck, and when she staggered back, she brought the other up onto the side of her head. Kiriko was spun around by the impact, fell onto her backside. Bobbi closed in, preparing to end the fight, when suddenly the Shift Cars exploded off of Kiriko’s holder and shot towards Bobbi. Bobbi was amazed when three little toy cars shot through the air at her, weaving a pattern around her – feinting towards her from left and right, above and below. Bobbi spun and swung out with her batons, trying land a blow on the fast moving cars. But in spite of her best moves she just couldn’t seem to connect with any of them. As quick as the attack began it was over, when the cars suddenly flew out into the night. Bobbi looked at Kiriko who was standing before her in her combat stance. She stomped her foot down, and then lashed out with a roundhouse kick that flew impossibly fast. Bobbi raised her baton to block the blow, but it struck with so much force that Bobbi was sent cartwheeling. She landed in a heap in the grass. Bobbi heard Hunter shouting something in her earpiece, but his voice was drowned out by the ringing in her ears. She looked up to see Kiriko closing in on her. She scissored her legs, and took Kiriko’s legs out from under her. She leaped on top of the Japanese woman, but cried out in pain. She realized that she had to have at least two broken ribs. She raised her right baton, and brought it crashing down on Kiriko’s head. She raised the left one up, but before she could bring it down, the little cars swarmed her again, seizing her attention. Kiriko threw Bobbi off of her, and the cars flew out of sight. Both women staggered to their feet, and dropped into their fighting stances. Kiriko stomped her foot down, and again fired off her Kiriko Kick at Bobbi. Bobbi blocked with her batons, and tried to roll with the blow, but again it came in too quickly and with too much power. Bobbi cartwheeled to the side, and struggled into a crouching position. Bobbi’s world seemed to go on spinning. Hunter was still jabbering in her earpiece, but she really couldn’t understand a word the man was saying. Of course, that was nothing new. When Kiriko stepped forward, Bobbi sprang forward, and fired a roundhouse swing at her with her right baton. When Kiriko blocked that blow, she brought the left baton around, striking the officer in the head. Kiriko staggered to her left and dropped back into her stance. Bobbi knew that another atomic kick was coming so she charged the capacitors in her batons. Kiriko brought her right foot up, and kicked forward at Bobbi. Bobbi brought her batons up, and when the devices met there was a flash of electricity and a small explosion. The two fighters were thrown onto their backs. They both staggered to their feet, and took up their stances. Neither could stand straight. Blood trickled from cuts above Kiriko’s eyes, while Bobbi flinched in pain with every breath she took. Smoke rose from Kiriko’s right shoe, while Bobbi’s batons sparked and smoldered. Suddenly, a S.H.I.E.L.D. rescue pod dropped onto the lawn beside the two women. Lance Hunter came charging out of the dark, and literally bowled Bobbi into the pod. The doors hissed shut, and Bobbi dropped into unconsciousness. Outside, a fantastic red car pulled up, and a man in a red armored suit leaped out. He stepped into a fighting stance, but the rescue pod shot up into the sky, instantly disappearing from sight. Kamen Rider Drive looked at Kiriko, and she looked at him. Then, her eyes rolled back in her head, and she dropped to the ground unconscious. K.O.! Results Boomstick: Oooookay. That was a disappointing ending. Wiz: Yeah, while the strengths of these two opponents were very asymmetrical, neither one really had a clear advantage over the other. Bobbi Morse was definitely the better fighter of the two. She fought Melinda May to a standstill, and almost overcame Hydra agent Grant Ward, before Agent 33 intervened, and even then the two had trouble overcoming her. Boomstick: And Kiriko Shijima had better equipment. Her Red Cowl Boots allowed her to deliver kicks that could kill a normal human being. Bobbi’s training allowed her to avoid the worst effects of the Boots, but could not stand against that kind of pounding forever. Wiz: And, while the Shift Cars were designed to fight Roidmudes, and not attack humans, they were able to provide a very good distraction against Bobbi. Boomstick: So, while each could really pound the other opponent, neither had a clear advantage that allowed her to finish the other one off. So this bout ends in a draw! Next Time Next time on Death Battle! the action is hot and heavy when we bring together two 80s action heroes. Two men enter, but only one comes out, when it's Dutch Schaefer vs. John Matrix! Trivia * This Death Battle feature Bobbi Morse from the television series, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., as recent changes in the comic book version of Mockingbird have changed the nature of the character. Cameo Appearances * Genpachiro Otta * Kamen Rider Drive * Lance Hunter Poll How many stars would you rate Kiriko Shijima vs. Mockingbird (AoS)? 5 stars 4 stars 3 stars 2 stars 1 star Category:What-If? 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